Sunday, October 4, 2009

Seasons of Life

My little #4 anxiously awaiting his time to play!

I can't believe it's Fall break! The weeks have flown by since school started in August. I've got a list of things I want to get done here at home since we are not planning anything special for our break. No extravagant travel plans for this family! Just time together resting, cleaning, playing and doing whatever may come our way! (Plus, Jan and I are planning a special 10 year anniversary trip back to Hawaii in December, so we are watching our dollars!) More about that later... :-)

Anyhow, we've had alot going on as we have begun this new Fall season, and we probably could use the rest from school for a few days!

With the onset of the new Fall season comes...Soccer! Jonah's 1st season of soccer! The boys have played two games already. I am so glad they are able to play together on the same team this year! I like to see them out there in this "season of life" together! And Mary Claire seems to be content watching and "cheering" her brothers on as they play. Well, until she spots something else more interesting and then...she's off! My grandmother was able to come to what was her first soccer game this past Sat., and she kept saying how happy she was to get to see her great-grandsons play! I believe it was what she needed.
Mary Claire "cheers" from the sideline!

"Granny" and Mary Claire clap for the soccer team!

My grandmother is 85 years old and has always lived in Jackson. For the past 2 weeks our family has been dealing with the fact that her husband, my (almost) 89 year old grandfather, has been placed in the hospital, and it doesn't look like he'll be coming home anytime soon. He is under psychiatric care and sadly, has now been diagnosed with lung cancer. Ironically, he has a mass about twice the size of the mass found in my father's lung earlier this year. And the doctors have said my grandfather's mass looks to be malignant whereas my father's turned out to be benign. My grandfather has had his share of struggles in his life...mostly mental struggles which his doctors believe may be a result of his time spent in France during WWII and what they have diagnosed as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. He has probably seen things I will never see or understand. He has struggled with depression for longer than I can remember or know. I only know what has been revealed to me through my parents. And they have probably shielded me from most things. Most who know him would never know he has these struggles. He is a wonderfully sweet Christian man who loves his family and is especially happy every time he sees my 3 children, his great-grandchildren.

My father is the only child of his parents who lives in close proximity to them. (The only one in the state of TN!) So, when my aunt returned to NC on Thursday, my father asked my grandmother to come to Covington to stay for a few days. She really doesn't need to be alone for long periods of time. She spent Friday and Saturday night with my parents which is why she was able to join us for the boys' soccer game Sat. morning.

I have been thinking alot about life's seasons these days with what has happened with my father's parents, and I can imagine that my parents are realizing that life seems to be coming full circle. That the ones who took care of them as they were little now need their care. It is sad to think about sometimes. As a child, you don't always think about it, but I began to think about the reality of this 5 1/2 years ago when my mom's father passed away. He was the first grandparent I lost. And it made me realize that I probably wasn't going to have my grandparents for many more years. I have always had them in my life and been very lucky in that respect. Plus, I have had a close relationship with them even though they lived in other cities. I guess it's just hard to imagine life without them. The harsh reality is that the day will come (and only God knows when that day will be) that I will be telling my children stories of my grandparents and their lives because they won't be here to tell it themselves. And that the season of my life with my grandparents will succumb to the memories I hold of our times together.

I am glad that I have these memories and that I am still able to make more memories with them. I am glad that these memories will include times they have spent and will spend with my children. I will hope that God will give us more time together and allow my children the ability to remember them in some way. I will treasure the time I still have with them. But above all else, I will treasure the comfort I have in knowing that when God does call them to leave this world, that I will see them again one day. And that we will start another season of life together...our eternal season of life.

I guess I would say, mostly for my own reassurance, that with every season of life comes change, and I find myself praying for the willingness to accept the change and trust God's purpose and will in it.


Elizabeth said...

I think this time in our lives everything makes you a little nostalgic. It is hard to grasp that we are getting older along with our loved ones. It is almost as if time is speeding by. It is difficult but I hope that new and old memories will comfort you. BTW, #4 looks pretty excited about the game:)Hope is has a fun soccer season.

Kendra said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandfather's prayers for him & your family.